The moment you find out about this betrayal, especially if the person who betrayed you was someone you deeply trusted, there is actually a physical response to this. Blood rushes to your ears, your face turns red, and you're not really sure if you're hearing everything correctly. It almost feels as if someone took a swing at your head.
Koreans often describe this feeling as
"머리가 띵해지는 기분이야." (It feels as if my head was '띵해지다')and the verb "띵해지다" describes exactly the above physical response. This word is slang, although not offensive and widely known among all demographics. It is so well-known that you can probably even use it in formal settings. For example, if you're having a bad headache and what you're feeling is similar to how you would feel in a case of betrayal (often a heavy dose of cough syrup does this to me), you could describe your condition to your doctor by saying:
머리가 띵해요.Before this expression existed, though, there was actually another expression in our parents' generation. This expression, once identical to "머리가 띵해지다," is "골때린다." The word "골" means "bones" in Chinese. In this particular context, it probably means your skull, which is "해골" in Korean. Remembering that Koreans like to take off the first letter of a word in order to become more informal and more vulgar, it is likely that "골" is a vulgarized form of "해골." And of course, "때린다" is "to hit," and its infinitive form is "때리다."
So, "골때린다" literally means "to hit (my) skull."
For example, if your boyfriend just dumped you out of nowhere, in your anger, you could say:
"너 정말 골때린다." (I feel as if you just hit me in the head.)And your (ex-)boyfriend will get that you are hurt by his betrayal, and understand that you weren't expecting it at all.
However, as this expression has been around for a long time, and almost everyone uses it, it lost some of its strong meaning. This is because Koreans like to exaggerate. So now you can use this expression without offending in certain cases. If your friend tells you a really funny joke, you can say
"ㅋㅋㅋ 너 정말 골때린다." (I feel as if you just hit me in the head.)In this case, this expression serves as a bit of a compliment, because you're acknowledging that his joke was completely unexpected, and it had an impact on you (as if you've been hit in the head.) The context makes this phrase almost a compliment, and your friend will remember your comment with pride.
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| "새끼" is a derogatory way to denote a person. "새끼" originally means young animals. So, "that person" is not only young (in Korean, treating someone your age or older as if they're younger than you is a huge insult), but also is nothing but an animal. Apparently, the guy in the picture has been surprised by someone to the degree where he feels hit in the head. |
You have to be very careful of when you use it, though. For example, say that you went to a karaoke room for the first time with your friend. And your friend's singing is hilarious in a bad way. It's just not what you expected at all (maybe her singing voice is funny, or she is so absorbed in her emotion that she looks a bit ridiculous, or whatever. Just you did not see it coming at all and it's really bad.) Then you could say:
"너 노래 정말 골때리게 부른다." (I feel as if I've been hit in the head by your singing.)She'll probably get really mad at you, and you'd have deserved it if you say it, because she didn't intend to surprise you with her singing. So this is not a good place to use this phrase.
However, if your friend was just being rude at the karaoke, not letting you take your turn, jumping in when you're actually singing really well and overpowering your voice with her voice, or god forbid, turn off your selection mid-way, then you could say:
"너 노래 정말 골때리게 부른다." (I feel as if I've been hit in the head by your singing.)This time, her manners were not what you were expecting, and you are offended by it. You would say it with a straight face, and with no trace of smile. She would still be offended, but hopefully upon reflection, she will understand that she's behaved badly with you.
While it's a subtle phrase to completely understand, it is also pretty versatile. Even the same sentences can have a completely different effect on people depending on how you say it (notice that even though I gave you four examples, same sentences were spoken twice.) And this is very common in Korean. Depending on your nuance, the same sentence could be the highest compliment, or the worst insult.
In general, however, I would refrain from using this phrase with elders, although they should know it (it's one of my dad's favourite phrases!) It doesn't feel right to me, and I don't see myself ever using it in front of my dad. I guess if we were both severely offended by the same person in the same situation, maybe I could try to make my dad feel better by bad-mouthing that person to my dad by saying
"저사람 정말 골때리네." (I feel as if I've been hit in the head by that person; That person is ridiculous.)But so far, this situation hasn't happened yet.
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